The Dark Side of the Moon

We’re making history this week.

Artemis II is carrying four astronauts the furthest into space any human has ever gone. These are the first humans to ever take in a full view of the far side of the moon.

I say “dark side,” even though technically it’s just as lit as the rest of it (and I’m pretty embarrassed I didn’t know that until this week).

It’s just a side of it we never see from here - kind of like people. There are parts that stay hidden, and not everyone is willing to admit they even exist.  

People love a good redemption arc, don’t they? Stories are full of them:

Anakin Skywalker
Severus Snape
Steve Harrington
Loki Laufeyson
Tony Stark
Theon Greyjoy
Jaime Lannister
Negan
Ebeneezer Scrooge

They all came from different worlds, but each of them hurt people in some form or another.

But eventually, they all experienced a life-changing redemption arc, which is probably why we remember them- we like believing people can change.

But that redemption didn’t come from time passing or halfhearted apologies.

It happened when they finally owned their bullshit.

And that’s the commonality I’m talking about this week: Pride, and what happens when someone refuses to let go of it.

In Loki, Season 2, Loki Laufeyson finally becomes vulnerable enough to admit, “I’m scared of being alone”. He acknowledges his craving for attention and belonging.

But in the end, he embraces an eternity of solitude to save everyone he loves as well as the entire multiverse.

Tony Stark’s redemption began in a little cave in Afghanistan. The arms-dealing narcissist suffers a near-fatal injury from his weapons and now can no longer ignore the consequences.

He shuts down manufacturing at a massive personal cost. He takes ownership and vows to be a better steward of his tech. And in the end, he sacrifices himself.

Eager for a father’s approval (that would never come), Theon betrays the Starks, kills innocents, and seizes Winterfell. His redemption was brutal, but he earned back the Starks’ trust.

In the end, he gave his life to protect Bran, the future king (which was a bullshit choice for king, but that’s a different conversation).

Negan goes from ruthless dictator to remorseful anti-hero. Scrooge evolved from a bitter miser into a benevolent man.

In every story, the character has their own ‘come to Jesus’ moment where they finally admit the uncomfortable truth of who they are. Not only is that painful, but it’s also very humbling.

And for people who refuse to see themselves as anything but right, justified, and ‘misunderstood,’ they tend to think that moment doesn’t apply to them.

Instead, they insist that ‘moving on’ is enough.

It isn’t. 

When someone refuses to face the truth or pretends what happened wasn’t that bad, you’re left with a troubling question: what’s to stop it from happening again?

If trust is earned (and hasn’t been), then what exactly is there to trust?

Promises? Heard those before.
Prayers? Said plenty. Still ended up here.

Hence why it’s not easy to just “just let it go”. Not this time.

But at some point, you get too old to live in the past. You can forgive, but you don’t have to forget. And maybe that’s my own pride talking there; I have my moments too, of course.

There’s a short list of people who’d happily back that up.  

But eventually, every one of those characters had to admit the same thing:
“It’s me. Hi. I’m the problem, it’s me.”

Loki Laufeyson, the narcissist, becomes vulnerable enough to admit he needs people.

Tony Stark, the genius with all the answers, admits he was ignorant to the damage he caused.

The deeply insecure Theon Greyjoy admits he tried to be someone he wasn’t.

Negan thought fear made him untouchable until he had no choice but to think about what he’d actually become.

Scrooge thought self-reliance gave him everything, until he learned he truly had nothing. 

Every single one of them had to be honest about who they really were, and that’s why we love these kinds of stories; we see exactly what they refuse to see.

And when they finally do, it feels like validation; there's an almost euphoric feeling of finally…you know, like when the enemy suddenly becomes the teammate, or the bad guy becomes good.

The whole vibe just changes for the better. Unfortunately, real life doesn’t always play out like that, but you know what? That’s okay.

Life’s too short and much too interesting to wait on closure from willfully blind people, so give it to your damn self and move on.

But never forget.

So anyway, Artemis II is scheduled to splash down off the coast of San Diego this evening, which is objectively cooler than anything happening down here.

And I say that as someone with her own birthday party this weekend.

Speaking of San Diego, Comic-Con’s just around the corner, with its own lineup of ‘can’t-miss’ moments. There’s no shortage of distractions, which I’m choosing to call timing, not avoidance.

I do have my pride, after all.   

Heather Papovich is the writer behind Unfinished Business, essays on real life, pop culture, and the fine art of not completely losing it.